Oh My Quiz

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Tuesday, October 11, 2005

I'll Be Dashed... Super Quiz

Hello Dashers. Welcome to the I'll Be Dashed... Super Quiz. Forgive me for referring to myself in the 3rd person. You know DJS hates to do that. Now, let's see how closely you've been paying attention...
  1. 1. What is DJS’s favorite comedy of all time?

  2. Fast Times at Ridgemont High
    Dumb and Dumber
    Raising Arizona
    Terms of Endearment

  3. Name the horse-faced actress from the list:

  4. Sarah Jessica Parker
    Jennifer Garner
    Julia Roberts
    Mr. Ed
    All of the above

  5. What movie has DJS sworn he would never see? Even if the fate of the world depended on it?

  6. Blues Brothers 2000
    Because of Wynn Dixie
    Butthole Delight 4
    A Walk In The Clouds

  7. What insect does DJS dislike the most?

  8. Mosquito
    Box-Elder Bug
    African Beetle
    Fire Ants

  9. What is the DJS-crafted word for making sweet, sweet love?

  10. Oooga Fooga
    Squish, squish, squorsh
    Bappity bappity

  11. What state is home to I’ll Be Dashed…Headquarters?

  12. State of Confusion
    Wisconsin (Sconnie)

  13. What type of meat will DJS never insert into his mouth hole?

  14. Beef
    Man meat
    Both man meat and fish

  15. DJ Shovelpants got his name from…

  16. A legendary folklore hero story
    Being a master on the 1’s and 2’s
    Nowhere. Just made it up
    His dad, DJ Shovelpants, Sr.
    That’s what his wife calls him

  17. Which celebrity does DJS hate with every fiber of his being?

  18. Oprah Winfrey
    Drew Barrymore
    Ricardo Montalban
    Kiefer Sutherland
    Jessica Simpson

  19. What sport does DJS watch with great earnest?

  20. Gotta be football!
    Take DJS out to the ball game!
    Boxing, fool.
    Boo-ya! It’s basketball!
    Is NASCAR a sport?

  21. What blend of coffee does DJS savor?

  22. Mocha triple caff, half espresso
    Mountain blend, lots of sugar, lots of cream
    He fucking hates coffee
    Iced coffee with some of those goddamn beans

  23. What movie does DJS make fun of Dirty for owning the ‘Ultimate Edition’ of?

  24. The Scorpion King
    Notting Hill
    Weekend at Bernies 2
    Terms of Endearment

  25. DJS killed a celebrity in his dream with a knife to the throat. Who was it?

  26. Vin Diesel
    That retarded looking kid from The O.C.
    Kelsey Grammer
    Jeremy Piven
    Justin Timberlake

  27. Which state does DJS think they could wipe off of the map of U.S.A. and no one would miss them?

  28. Ohio
    New Mexico
    South Dakota
    All of the above

  29. Why is this blog called ‘I’ll Be Dashed…’?

  30. Because it’s so damn catchy
    Because DJS worked with a smelly guy who said it all the time
    Because dashes are soooo 2005
    Because ‘Soft Drink’ was soooo 2001
    Because ‘Vertical Smiles’ was taken

  31. What celebrity touched DJS on both shoulders more than 3 times?

  32. Macho Man Randy Savage
    Emilio Estevez
    Sigourney Weaver
    Uma Thurman
    Jeremy Irons

  33. DJS, picky-eater that he is, has a real aversion to what types of food?

  34. Delicious food
    Foods with tomato-based sauces
    Things that have bread included in them
    Entrees that have white, creamy shit in it
    Food loaded with salt

  35. What religious denomination is DJS?

  36. Lutheran
    None of the above

  37. Does he practice his religion?

  38. Hell no. He’s agnostic.
    Yes. He goes to church every Sunday like every other blind follower.
    Why, yes. He does enjoy eating ‘Christ Chex’ by the fistful
    Actually, he’s an ordained minister
    He collects bibles as a hobby

  39. What country music artist does DJS listen to?

  40. Willie Nelson
    Hank Williams Jr.
    Johnny Cash (but he doesn’t really count as country)
    Shania Twain
    Garth Brooks

  41. On any given roadtrip, what can you count on DJS having in large supply?

  42. Sacka grass
    Industrial-sized Diet Coke
    Orange Tic-Tacs

  43. Speaking of roadtrips, which of these bands has DJS seen with Dirty?

  44. Bjork
    Tenacious D
    Bjork & Eels only
    All of the above

  45. What movie did DJS see with HAL in Rochester, New York that made him cry like a little bitch?

  46. Pay It Forward
    Free Willy 3
    In America
    Weekend at Bernies 2
    Terms of Endearment

  47. What is the worst CD DJS has ever owned in his life?

  48. Andrew W.K. – I Get Wet
    Bloodhound Gang – Hefty Fine
    Coldplay - XYZ
    Morrissey – Seriously, I’m Gay
    Ren & Stimpy – You Eeeediot!!!

  49. How often does DJS watch TV?

  50. Almost never
    All the f’in time
    He watches an occasional show, but only the few he tapes
    He prefers to read the classics instead

Christ. That was a waste of time, wasn't it?

If you scored 70% or below, please remove me from your 'Favorites.'

Thanks for reading.


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